Written 10/9/20
It rained today.
The world gets quieter and emptier when it rains. I drove myself to class in silence this morning. I thought about the rain instead of listening to music. Everything feels shifted, and I blame that on the fact that I'm the only person as far as I can see. I feel a little bit transparent.
I step out onto the wet pavement and see no one on the sidewalks. The calendar says I'm supposed to be here, but my head is telling me I'm wrong. It's too empty here.
Isn't it Sunday? Isn't it the weekend?
I had classes yesterday. It can't be.
I am at the right school. I parked in the same place I always do. There's no other building I could be walking to. I feel lost.
I ask myself if I'm forgetting something. I'm not.
I lock my car anyway, swing my backpack onto my shoulders. I cut through the grass instead of taking the sidewalk and feel the wet grass soak into my shoes. While I'm walking, I have to check the date again, just to make sure that I'm not in the wrong place.
I sit through my class. We finish the movie we've been watching, and my professor lets us out fifteen minutes early. The world is just as empty as I walk back through the drizzle.
Isn't it Sunday?
I check my phone. It isn't Sunday. That changes exactly nothing.
